LLM Class of 2008!

It's been quite a week!

I have but one regret. I had the opportunity to help someone before things went astray and I didn't for several reasons. I know I made the right choice to wait--but I am still not happy that things went this way. At the same time, I probably wouldn't do it differently next time. I don't know...ethical choices always leave me confused.

Last week all I did was eat! There was plenty of free food at work, but my worst day was Friday. I went out for breakfast with a friend--then out for lunch with other friends---then out for dinner (Hibachi grill) with an entirely different group!!! The scientists are right when they say friends can make you fat!!! The Chinese dude at the Hibachi grill was hilarious! He turns to one of the guys in our groups who was there with his girlfriend and says--"hey I know you! You were here last Friday with a cute blond girl...but the one you have tonight is cuter...can I have her number?" we were all rolling on the ground at that!

Oh and my cholesterol is high....not very...but the good news is both my HDL and LDL are high, so things balance out. I aint cutting out the bacon yet:-) I told my doctor I would be making false promises if i said I would...she said I am very honest, and we moved on. One person you should never lie to is your doctor. Trust me on that one.

So my baby brother graduated yesterday from his master of laws program...and i had the pleasure to let the person sitting behind me know that he just turned 22 a little over a month ago! I am soooo proudy-woudy:-)

I opted to drive there...yeah...and yes I did speed I confess. I wont say how long it took me to get there...but all I can say is--I AM THE WOMAN BABY!!! I just totally ROCK!!! lol.

I think I really like Ithaca. It may be because it's in the bushes deep deyole...but it's certainly a quaint little town. My brother lives down town right around a lot of prime eating places...and I ate a LARGE steak....it was off the hook!

During the celebration I cried twice I think....I'm probably hormonal...but too many things factored in and I couldn't help it:-) for one thing...my BABY brother who's poopie nappies I changed was graduating. Then for another--the faculty member that gave the speech almost broke down several times when he spoke of the harsh times of being a lawyer. He was right in stating that you're holding someones life in your hands...and you have to make your best effort at helping them. Then finally one of the girls graduating was black and blind...she used her guide dog to help her walk across the stage and everyone gave her standing ovation. It still brings me tears to write that. That is what you call determination in the face of tribulation!

I also met Cornell's favorite Zambian--Professor Ndulo

The organizers did a great job with the ceremony and the reception. They had tables and tables of Hors d'oeuvre, champagne over flowing, and all types of desserts. I don't have to tell you what I was drinking:-)
My brother gave me my first guitar!!! I am soooo excited...I took it on a test drive and sang a few songs...and we're really bonding. i could be the next Janis Jolin/ Tracy Chapman/ Ani Defranco or whatever.

I had a horrible drive home because it was raining heavily and dark...and just yucky!

I am preparing for the arrival of C$ and her munchkin... it will be a major blast! I am on a mini vay cay from work and loving it!

Also if my sister hurries up and has a baby, I may go to London soon! wait let me call and find out of the baby is here because we are TIRED of waiting!...ummm nope...no baby yet!

Any way....my next post will be about Burma.

Letter to my Brother

My dearest brother,
You whom I love. Who is first in line for my organs if needed. I have known you since you were born. I remember watching you many nights as you slept, praying over you that were the house attacked may they kill me before you. Even now, I hope that you will live to be at my funeral and not the other way round.
I have watched you grow with my opinion of you changing at each stage from adorable to annoying to amazing. I can not tell you how proud you have made me over the years and I can only wish the best for you and hope that you will do more amazing things in your life.
We do not talk about it often, but I know the hardships you have endured. I know it’s a problem for you that dad is not there and died way too early for you to have known him. He had his faults, but who doesn’t? I would have preferred for him to be here so you could learn from his mistakes or from whatever he did right so it could help you in your journey to manhood.
We had a very difficult conversation this evening, and I knew it would come one day and I have feared this day. I told you before that I had been having disturbing dreams about someone taking you away and I would always wake up in tears. I explained to you that the reason I was having those dreams was because I needed to learn that you are your own person and I need to let you make your own mistakes through trial and error. You are always about 8-11 years old in my dreams, which is probably how I will always remember you. In my most recent dream this week, I accepted what you had to say and I just held you. I did not cry this time. I just prayed and held you.
Like I said to you earlier there are things in life that are hard to explain. It’s like the law school versus music career conversation we had a few years back. You woke up one day and saw where I was coming from. I feel the path you ‘might’ choose is the wrong one for you because I have seen it not work for a countless number of people. My feelings about the subject could also just be my prejudice, and I am somewhat ashamed to admit it. Religion and faith are two things no one can chose for you in a free society.
I have crossed the line with you many times by defaulting to the position of ‘mum’ and not sister, and as ‘mum’ I am having a hard time accepting that it’s time to let go and let you find your own path. At times I feel the worl is waiting to take advantage of you. There are questions in your life that I can not answer for you, and I am glad you have found what/ who can.
I will always support you even when we disagree. God made sure we were born in the same family for a reason. He just forgot to give me a 'being sister' manual.
Use your judgment. You are probably smarter than me….nah! Who I’m I kidding? We all know I’m smarter Live your life to the fullest. It is YOUR life to live.
To handle yourself, use your head, to handle others use your heart.

FYI: I did cry when I wrote this because I am a foolish lady… and with your help, I will eventually learn to be less judgmental and just let you be you.
Je t’aime.